The Value Of No-thing
A friend told me how Seeing helped him in a difficult situation. He and his wife had a fairly serious row – due in fact to a misunderstanding. So she stayed away overnight with her sister. In the morning they agreed to meet in a café to talk. On the way my friend remembered reading in one of Douglas Harding’s books that it’s wise to practise
Seeing when times are easy, but if you also practise Seeing in difficult times you will really discover how valuable it is. So on the way to the café my friend decided to make it a priority to consciously be space for his wife – space here to her face there. They sat down and he was room for her, capacity for her, wearing her face instead of his own, seeing there was no distance, no separation. Being the space, he listened. He found himself not jumping to his own defence but taking in and understanding her point of view. After a while I think his wife began to wonder what was happening! She was being listened to! Not long afterwards they left the café holding hands, wondering what all the fuss had been about!
Find out how valuable no-thing
can be! Be space for a difficult situation. Consciously be room for your wife, your husband, your friend, your boss, your colleague, a stranger… not only when times are easy but also when times are hard. I’m sure you will discover, and re-discover, again and again, the amazing value of no-thing
Thirty spokes share the wheel’s hub;
It is the center hole that makes it useful.
Shape clay into a vessel;
It is the space within that makes it useful.
Cut doors and windows for a room;
It is the holes which make it useful.
Therefore benefit comes from what is there;
Usefulness from what is not there.
(From the Tao Te Ching
, translated by Gia-Fu Feng & Jane English, pub. Vintage.)
Just a note to express a deep heartfelt thank you for all the work you're doing and for putting together the "Welcome To Reflection" series! Michael.
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